Alexandra Kelley

Witch – Dominant- Sadist – Seeker of the Unknown – Phone Sex with a definite twist

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Solstice

June 21st, 2009 · No Comments

Sit and relax will you?  I made up a batch of cakes for the fairies and as usual I made to many… would you like one?  Summer Solstice,  The longest day of the year and one just begging for blessings and celebration. I have been up since just before day break having a private celebration and now am relaxing with a strong cup of coffee and contemplating a morning nap.

The Summer Solstice is also known as: Alban Heflin, Alben Heruin, All-couples day, Feast of Epona, Feast of St. John the Baptist, Feill-Sheathain, Gathering Day, Johannistag, Litha, Midsummer, Sonnwend, Thing-Tide, Vestalia, etc.

People around the world have observed spiritual and religious seasonal days of celebration during the month of June. Most have been religious holy days which are linked in some way to the summer solstice. On this day, typically JUN-21, the daytime hours are at a maximum in the Northern hemisphere, and night time is at a minimum. It is officially the first day of summer. It is also referred to as Midsummer because it is roughly the middle of the growing season throughout much of Europe.

Neopaganism: This is a group of religions which are attempted re-constructions of ancient Pagan religions. Of these, Wicca is the most common; it is loosely based partly on ancient Celtic beliefs and practices. Wiccans recognize eight seasonal days of celebration. Four are minor sabbats and occur at the two solstices and the two equinoxes. The other are major sabbats which happen approximately halfway between an equinox and solstice. The summer solstice sabbat is often called Midsummer or Litha. Wiccans may celebrate the sabbat on the evening before, at sunrise on the morning of the solstice, or at the exact time of the astronomical event.

Midsummer is the time when the sun reaches the peak of its power, the earth is green and holds the promise of a bountiful harvest. The Mother Goddess is viewed as heavily pregnant, and the God is at the apex of his manhood and is honored in his guise as the supreme sun.

If you wish to read more on various cultural celebrations- Click here

The Fairy Cake Recipe that I enjoy -

Makes 24 mini cakes or 12 larger ones.

 For mini cakes you will need a 12 hole tartlet tin (these are 5cm at the rim and 1 1/2 cm deep) and you will need to use it twice. For larger cakes use a 12-hole bun tin (these are 6 1/2 cm at the rim and 2cm deep). You can use the little paper cases according to the size tin you have. If not, butter the base and sides of the holes before filling with the mixture.

  4 1/2 oz softened butter

  • 125g / 4 1/2 oz caster sugar
  • 2 eggs, lightly beaten
  • 1 tsp vanilla extract
  • 125g / 4 1/2 oz self-raising flour
  • 2 tbsp milk 
    1. Preheat the oven to 190C/375F/Gas mark 5. Either butter the tin or place the paper cases in the holes (see above). In a mixing bowl beat the butter and sugar until pale and fluffy. You can use an electric whisk or a wooden spoon.
    2. Add the beaten egg, a little at a time, whisking to incorporate, then beat in the vanilla.
    3. Sift in half of the flour and fold into the mixture. Add the milk and the rest of the flour and fold until well combined.
    4. Spoon into the tin and bake for 12 minutes or until risen and golden on top. Allow to cool for ten minutes on a rack before removing from the tin.

     

    Ideas for Toppings

    Lemon or Orange Glacé Icing with Cherries

      4 oz icing sugar

  • 2 tbsp freshly squeezed lemon or orange juice
  • 12 glacé cherries, cut in half (these work best when making the mini cakes)Mix the juice into the icing sugar and stir until well blended. Drizzle over the cakes when cooled. Top with the cherries, cut side down, while the icing is still soft.

    Chocolate Ganache Glaze

      5 1/2 oz good quality dark chocolate

  •  5 fl oz double cream

    Break the chocolate into pieces and heat gently with the cream in a bowl set over a pan of simmering water. Stir until the chocolate is melted and the mixture well blended. Allow to cool slightly to thicken then pour over the cakes. It will harden on cooling.

    Enjoy your day My darlings…. it only comes once a year

    Alexandra

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    Death and Phone Sex

    June 2nd, 2009 · No Comments

    Ok really nothing at all to do with phone sex.. but hey its a good title…

    20 Things You Didn’t Know About … Death
    Soapy corpses, ecological burials, dead relatives on parade and more

    By LeeAundra Temescu
    Provided by Discover magazine
    1. The practice of burying the dead may date back 350,000 years, as evidenced by a 45-foot-deep pit in Atapuerca, Spain, filled with the fossils of 27 hominids of the species Homo heidelbergensis, a possible ancestor of Neanderthals and modern humans.

    2. There are at least 200 euphemisms for death, including “to be in Abraham’s bosom,” “just add maggots” and “sleep with the Tribbles” (a “Star Trek” favorite).

    3. No American has died of old age since 1951.

    4. That was the year the government eliminated that classification on death certificates.

    5. The trigger of death, in all cases, is lack of oxygen. Its decline may prompt muscle spasms, or the “agonal phase,” from the Greek word “agon,” meaning “contest.”

    6. Within three days of death, the enzymes that once digested your dinner begin to eat you. Ruptured cells become food for living bacteria in the gut, which release enough noxious gas to bloat the body and force the eyes to bulge outward.

    7. So much for recycling: Burials in America deposit 827,060 gallons of embalming fluid — formaldehyde, methanol and ethanol — into the soil each year. Cremation pumps dioxins, hydrochloric acid, sulfur dioxide and carbon dioxide into the air.

    8. Alternatively, a Swedish company, Promessa, will freeze-dry your body in liquid nitrogen, pulverize it with high-frequency vibrations and seal the resulting powder in a cornstarch coffin. They claim this “ecological burial” will decompose in six to 12 months.

    9. Zoroastrians in India leave out the bodies of the dead to be consumed by vultures.

    10. The vultures are now dying off after eating cattle carcasses dosed with diclofenac, an anti-inflammatory used to relieve fever in livestock.

    11. Queen Victoria insisted on being buried with the bathrobe of her long-dead husband, Prince Albert, and a plaster cast of his hand.

    12. If this doesn’t work, we’re trying in vitro! In Madagascar, families dig up the bones of dead relatives and parade them around the village in a ceremony called “famadihana.” The remains are then wrapped in a new shroud and reburied. The old shroud is given to a newly married, childless couple to cover the connubial bed.

    13. Sometimes, under the right conditions of temperature and humidity, fatty tissue of a buried body will turn to a soap-like substance called adipocere, or grave wax. Adipocere formation relies on a cold, damp environment and an absence of oxygen; once begun, this saponification can continue for centuries.

    14. Well, yeah, there’s a slight chance this could backfire: English philosopher Francis Bacon, a founder of the scientific method, died in 1626 of pneumonia after stuffing a chicken with snow to see if cold would preserve it.

    15. For organs to form during embryonic development, some cells must commit suicide. Without such programmed cell death, we would all be born with webbed feet, like ducks.

    16. In 1907, a Massachusetts doctor conducted an experiment with a specially designed deathbed and reported that the human body lost 21 grams upon dying. This has been widely held as fact ever since. It’s not.

    17. Buried alive: In 19th-century Europe there was so much anecdotal evidence that living people were mistakenly declared dead that cadavers were laid out in “hospitals for the dead” while attendants awaited signs of putrefaction.

    18. Eighty percent of people in the United States die in a hospital.

    19. More people commit suicide in New York City than are murdered.

    20. It is estimated that 100 billion people have died since humans began.

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    What’s Wrong with Phone Sex

    May 8th, 2009 · No Comments

    A message from the Jehovah’s Witnesses Official Web Site

    Is phone sex harmless?

    Sexual desire is especially strong during youth. The Bible calls this period when sexual desires are at their peak “the bloom of youth.” (1 Corinthians 7:36) During this crucial time in life, a Christian youth should learn to “get possession of his own vessel in sanctification and honor.” (1 Thessalonians 4:4) That is, you must learn how to cope with and control your sexual feelings. This is crucial to having a healthy, balanced view of sex.

    Telephone sex, however, teaches one to indulge, rather than control, one’s sexual impulses. More than that, it promotes a degrading, distorted view of the opposite sex. The Bible teaches that sexual intimacies should be enjoyed only within the framework of marriage. (Hebrews 13:4) But phone sex encourages young ones to experience sexual pleasures outside marriage. The Bible teaches that real happiness comes from giving—not getting. (Acts 20:35) But phone sex teaches one to use others as a means for selfish gratification. The Bible teaches married couples to develop true intimacy by cultivating mutual love and trust. (Ephesians 5:2233) Telephone sex, however, promotes coldness and anonymity.

    Hehe I have been meaning to write this  ever since I came across the article in my wanderings.  Isn’t it amusing how the writings of the bible can be tweaked even to apply to something as harmless as Phone Sex? 

    More from the article: Stimulating sexual desires while you are still unmarried runs counter to the counsel of God’s Word. It urges: “Deaden, therefore, your body members that are upon the earth as respects fornication, uncleanness, sexual appetite.”—Colossians 3:5.

    Bad Bad Sinners!   Come unto me and let Alexandra soothe your sinful body and cause it to do all types of wicked, nasty, WRONG things… it is only in the fire that is She you shall be truly cleansed ~smile~

    Should you want to read the entire article – You will find it here

    I just love me some bible thumpers, and soon my dears.. I shall reveal my very VERY favorite religious site.  I must savor it more before sharing however,  I never knew that christians could be just so very twisted and it amuses me.

    Now, why do you not come to the alter that is Alexandra, and we will pray together… hmmm? You will find me exclusively at The Phone Sex Bar.

    Alexandra
    1 866 329-2670

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    Change of Venue

    April 23rd, 2009 · No Comments

     You may have noticed that I am no longer at my former company - Not to worry, I am still available for sessions ~smile~  It was simply time to part ways.

    You can now find me at http://thephonesexbar.com and I believe you will be pleasantly surprised when you arrive.
    I now have a direct line now 1 866 329-2670 where I can be reached for a session.  Should I not answer my direct line, please do leave a voice mail indicating you would like a call or simply send me an email and I will contact you. 

    I am also trying to work out a way that I can take international calls from select countries.. so stay tuned!A quick note of apology to those I haven’t gotten back to via email.  It has been a very hectic few days and I hope to be settled in after today and catching up.

     

    Have a lovely day.

    Alexandra
    1 866 329-2670

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    Easter Sunday

    April 12th, 2009 · No Comments

    Well I think in honor of Easter Sunday we need something special and in my mind that means a visit to the LaLaurie house of New Orleans.  I have been waiting for the excuse to write about it, because not only is it a deliciously morbid tale, but also an excellent ghost story.. both of which are eerily appropriate on Easter don’t you think?

    An exerpt: According to the newspaper, the New Orleans Bee, all of the victims were naked and the ones not on tables were chained to the wall. Some of the women had their stomachs sliced open and their insides wrapped about their waists. One woman had her mouth stuffed with animal excrement and then her lips were sewn shut.

    The men were in even more horrible states. Fingernails had been ripped off, eyes poked out, and private parts sliced away. One man hung in shackles with a stick protruding from a hole that had been drilled in the top of his head. It had been used to “stir” his brains.

    The tortures had been administered so as to not bring quick death. Mouths had been pinned shut and hands had been sewn to various parts of the body. Regardless, many of them had been dead for quite some time. Others were unconscious and some cried in pain, begging to be killed and put out of their misery.

    There is something about stirring someones brains that just makes my juices flow.. wouldn’t you agree? ~smile~  If you want more, and I know you do, check out the full story complete with hauntings here.

    Stop by for some brain stirring of your own, Alexandra style if you dare.  You can find me here on my own site, or of course having an Easter drink at the Phone Sex Bar.

    Phone Sex provided with a Sadistic Twist.

    Alexandra Kelley

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    Vampires in Venice

    March 21st, 2009 · No Comments

    ROME – An archaeological dig near Venice has unearthed the 16th-century remains of a woman with a brick stuck between her jaws — evidence, experts say, that she was believed to be a vampire.

    The unusual burial is thought to be the result of an ancient vampire-slaying ritual. It suggests the legend of the mythical bloodsucking creatures was tied to medieval ignorance of how diseases spread and what happens to bodies after death, experts said.

    The well-preserved skeleton was found in 2006 on the Lazzaretto Nuovo island, north of the lagoon city, amid other corpses buried in a mass grave during an epidemic of plague that hit Venice in 1576.

    “Vampires don’t exist, but studies show people at the time believed they did,” said Matteo Borrini, a forensic archaeologist and anthropologist at Florence University who studied the case over the last two years. “For the first time we have found evidence of an exorcism against a vampire.”

    For more on this Click Here

    Now for a note on Jezebel.. ~smile~  My newest project and the latest Consort of Her Lord Satan.  I do so love it when people come to me for complete transformations – from a boring jewish man to a stunningly sexy female consort in 2 easy steps ~smile~  What else is there?

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    March

    March 9th, 2009 · No Comments

    I find myself being a bit introspective and realizing that I have been neglectful of my website as of late.  I haven’t decided if I am bored with the word press format or not, any thoughts?  I have you will notice (or not as the case may be) cleaned out The Application of Servitude and the Session Feedback pages.  I think I want a little bit more than canned answers to questions from you.  Can you provide that? ~smile~  I have faith that you can.

    The design of The Phone Sex Bar has made me realize and remember just how much I hate being sterile in my dealings.  Not being permitted to say or write what I wish to express was rather annoying, especially when I am feeling as brutal and morbid as I have been lately.  I could do with a scene that includes blood, dismemberment and perhaps even an extended and prolonged snuff.  I think that would help my mood and enhance your session, don’t you?  Limits are for pussies after all.

    Wander into my web…..and let me sink my fangs into your soul..

    Alexandra

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    Unexpected Presents

    February 25th, 2009 · No Comments

    I do so love presents, so many thanks to my U.K. friend for Season 2 of Dexter from my Amazon Wish List !   It was an unexpected surprise that brightened my day, don’t you think those are the best type?

    Yes, before you ask – the forms on my website again are messed up, so I am going to trash them and start completely over this weekend.

    Repo- The Genetic Opera.   My review.

    Ok.. as promised I am giving you my review of the Genetic Opera.  First off I have to say my experience would probably have been VASTLY different if I had seen it on the big screen.  All n all, I was somewhat disappointed in the film.  While Anthony Stewart Head put on a stunning performance ( when does he not?) the film was lacking in depth I think.  The gore was impressive, but as a whole it was somewhat disjointed in my humble opinion.  Not being a fan of Paris Hilton, I think she didn’t give anything to the role of Amber Sweet and it could have been better cast.

    That being said.. the soundtrack is indeed the most impressive part of the film.  I find the music popping into my head at the oddest moments and I think eventually the soundtrack will end up on my shelf.

    Is it worth a rent?  Absolutely.  If you have the chance, definitely see it on the big screen.

    There you have it…. my opinion for what its worth. ~smile~

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    Strange Energies Afoot

    January 31st, 2009 · No Comments

    Do you feel it in the air??  I certainly do.. strange vibes pulsing through the air and getting stronger every day.  Is it a wonder that I have been doing a rush of Rune Stone Castings and Tarot Card readings lately?  I think that Sydney was pleasantly surprised with the accuracy of her private reading, and many thanks to Georgia for resolving my e-mail issues.  Should you desire to peek into your future, please do schedule a session. I only ask that you give me 10-15 minutes notice on a reading so I have the time to clear my mind of mundane thoughts and focus on your needs.

    I have lit my last Prairie Sage candle from Votivo’s French line of candles and it burns merrily in the corner of the room dispelling the feelings weighing upon my shoulders today and soothing my very soul as the aroma wraps around me in comfort.  My copy of Repo Man- The Genetic Opera is on its way and should be here within days. many thanks to M for the amazon gift card to purchase it with ~smile~  I will give you my complete review once I have watched it entirely.

    I am ready to say goodbye to winter this year, I don’t like being trapped in the cold confines of Isis while she sleeps, I have a feeling of anticipation that defys her and wants to break free and push forward.  I suppose that time will soon expose his secrets.

    Alexandra

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    Crazy Bitch

    January 20th, 2009 · No Comments

    I was told….. this reminds a certain someone of Me ~smile~ I like it… It does suit to a certain degree..

     The same certain individual sent me a fantastic article on cannibalism that I will share with you at another time.  It has been a bit of time since I last posted, the New Year has been hectic and exciting and of c0urse updating my blog is usually the last thing on my mind ~laugh~

    That being said, I am off for breakfast and I shall update later.

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